"Know how to live the time that is given to you."

I miss this. I miss it dearly. My Babies.  

And this. My three year old little boy in dishtowel capes and super hero underwear. The boy who played Star Wars night and day and thought those pajamas that he was wearing would give him super human speed. The boy who once gave me 100 kisses for a Birthday present.

But I love this. I love it dearly. My big kids. Happy and sweet. Smart and funny. Our family is so blessed. Just look at that girl who's gonna be four next month! The girl who loves Hello Kitty, baby dolls and hair bows.

“Time is free, but it's priceless. You can't own it, but you can use it. You can't keep it, but you can spend it. Once you've lost it you can never get it back.” Harvey MacKay

Sometimes when I wonder why I haven't been able to have more babies, I remember that if we are ever blessed enough to have another child, it will be a very special soul that was saved just for our family. God proved that to me by sending John and Anna just for me. I was made for them and they for me. When I remember all the babies that I lost before they had a chance to be here for us to name and to hold. To know and to kiss, it only makes me more grateful to Heavenly Father for blessing me with John and Anna. I will be forever grateful unto Him for blessing me with the profound and life changing blessing of being a mother. I am so thankful to our Heavenly Father for saving these two precious spirits just for me and for His gift of Eternal Life so that one day, our family may meet those sweet spirits that never experienced life on earth with us.